eccentric-city.

what i long for is just a night for me to stay atop everyone and then look down at the world sleeping away. keeping silent to hear the whispers of the grapevine and just sit at the edge, reading murakami's the elephant vanishes (a mind fucking blowing book), and watch as my slippers carelessly careens over the edge and falls with a plop! on the ground.

the feel of a numbing mind would never give way to a hard heart; one that knows know fury nor cheap banter. it's one thing to jostle about trying to pretend to be the normal one, it's another to be so engrossed in seeking normalities, that the main reason for these atrocious actions are forgotten.

if this is as good as goodness comes, then strike me off whatever list that has my bloody name on it, and just let it burn. feel the heat; the warmth and friendliness of fire against body and let the skin wilt away. how it must feel so free to stand there and just watch over every single moving thing, to just feel (not have, mind you) the power to imagine, pretend and fret over mundanities and unspoken words.

and then feeling the soles of thy feet slowly making dents in the hard cement. how free, guiltless and easily given.

herein lies A moment
i've always thought was never possible.

how inviting this darkness sometimes pretend to be when all it is is another temptation. when the plop! wont really be what it is, but an amplified version with the splat! adding to all that commotion. such ungrateful wretchedness, and the mutterings of everybody else saying how useless how stoopid the answer taken how young and vulnerable when no one actually gives a flying fuck. it just gives yet another opportunity to try and strike it big. now there's a suitable drama for them kiddies to take after.

or not, just another story to tell under void-deck lights.

this is just another entry shitty battle that refuses to let its ugly head down. all i smell is its rear end, and believe you me, that is one hideous non-aroma. life in constant motion and thoughts in constant gear- the neverendings of physics never cease to amaze.

do you realize how dispensable you can be, do you realize how easy it is to have you replaced without missing a single heartbeat. come, pray tell me, did life come just as how you ordered it even though i know like hell you will deny its worth.

at the end of it all, you wont understand what i've written. here is just jargon (or not?) and the might of a mind perpetually uneasy.

this is meant to kill and displease. like the watchful eye observing the weakling tossed out of the ceiling and falling, like a long ironic dance that refuses to stop. sometimes what i need is what i really long for. that's all there is and ever will be.