i wince everytime i hear the sentence "what we only want from you is....". this is confusing. not only do they "only want" us to study hard, they also "only want" us to clean our room, "only want" us to follow whatever they say, "only want" us to do our best, "only want" us to be happy, "only want" us to be safe, yadayadayada.
see, this is why parents and their children dont understand each other. wants coincide and needs are just too much for each to bear.
dearmum and moi confronted them at, of all places, macdonalds. i didnt know what to play; the supporting actress or the second-in-command villain. they were in the wrong, somewhat. and she crossed the line. why am i always stuck in the middle?
and yet, somehow, i helped.
i guess, heh.
i hate to be the one to tell dearmum but i did. the problem with my parents is that they treat us as muslims/muslimahs first before people. it's like we're not even real people to them. we're their muslim children. fullstop. it's not a bad thing, mind you- at least they keep us grounded. but at some point, everything to them is about religion. i know the most pious of people and yet they still have their wrongdoings.
if i get into trouble. say... i spend too much and used up my pay. the typical convo between my dad or mum would end off with: "tengok, apasal kau dah takde duit? sebab kau tak belajar agama. sebab kau takde ilmu. sebab kau tak pergi belajar sebab tu kau jadi macam gini".
erm, hello. i spend too much and im dubbed as having lack of knowledge. i have a spending problem and i need financial help.
im being a religious prick here, but really, sometimes all we need is a parent, someone to hear us out and help with our problem. phsychologically. not be told off by two (sort of) religious leaders.
anyway, that aside, it hurts to tell my mum that.
the downside of being close to her.
we have opposing views, dearmum and me. i guess i am more liberated. hah, i should be, looking at what century im in. sometimes they dont get it, and i feel like just a child.
she understands though, and that matters alot to me.
deardad on the other hand is a brickwall that will never collapse.