today, i wanted to talk about the future. our future, something i adamantly refused to even think about. kit's and isa's questions kept me thinking (like i dont have enough on my mind).
i dont want to get my hopes up. i dont want to plan and be disappointed. i dont want to imagine and have nice blissful thoughts in my head only to have it pulled from under me. i prefer to just live up to now, live up to the moment (and many many more cliches like that). not the past, and most importantly, not looking towards the future.
i dont know what came over me to talk about it. somehow sitting there, looking up at the stars, i thought about how big the world really is and how trapped we are in this life, doing what we're doing. i just wondered what i'll be doing later on. whether i'll die young or not. or whether i'll live to hold my great great grandchildren albeit shaking, wrinkled arms.
will you love me then?