too bad you're buutiful

[emo trip: saddened, stoned. mist covers the light in eyes, blinded by them tears.]

didnt sink in till today.

i live in a world of silence. i dont hear anything except the chatter, the walking and the rustling. didnt realise how irritating the sounds of the beeps polyphonics and announcements were till today. felt so un-me. no more shutting myself from the world. nothing to hide behind anymore. crummy feeling.

cool crap totally sucks. i fail to see the purpose of their existance.

im not just saying this coz theyre my frens nor am i saying this just because i want to keep my friendship. theyre really really good. i tink they have something here. few songs can make me close my eyes, and think. but theirs can. their songs make me want to spread out my arms and just take in all this artificial wind. dance dance twirl twirl in my living room, this blasted old stinkin room.

done.

good conversations are a gem, especially the ones online. i rarely have them. it's bloody easy to type 'L-O-L' 'haha' 'hehe' and 'L-M-A-O' even though you feel otherwise. i wonder why we do that. no, dont worry, i dont use that unnecessarily. im just saying it's right there and some people will do that. okay, im confused.

meeting of sorts.4 girls and one half-bored guy. not a wasted evening, but a rather hot night. with a little tinge of disappointment in the morning and afternoon. no biggie but i hate anticipating. period. okay, have to get used to it, i gerrit now.

wanted to take a picture believe me. so rare for yours truly to say that. no camera though so reflection in mirror will have to do. for now? hah. im not an optimist, sorry. so much for wanting everything to be documented pictured and remembered.

still it was full of laughs. and a promise to make it last. goodbye goodbye, to three long years well spent and this is what we've come to. promises meet-ups and long dinners. just get-togethers. and lots of phone calls. im not one for phone calls, but it's a good habit i plan to keep.

no lack of colour today. black white yellow green and sparkling blue.
oh come on now, na na na na na.

meeting them after their time was spent together. so great to look at familiar faces. confessions made, knowledge of whatever's to come, a regret, wanting to know more and one confused man. automatically made a weekly affair. hooray.

i want you here with me mostly. to hell with the mp3, i was just selfish.
goodnight and hello saturday.